I adjure you,[c] O daughters of Jerusalem,
by the gazelles or the does of the field,
that you not stir up or awaken love
until it pleases.
Song of Solomon 2:7
I was at work one day and a mom came in with her son. She was telling us that they were looking forward to his girlfriend coming and hoping that she brought a nice gift for her son. I smiled, and then the mom told me her son is 1 year old! My mouth dropped open! I also laughed.
However; as I thought about her statement, it didn't sit well. I know people talk about their toddlers having boyfriends or girlfriends all the time. Everyone thinks it is so cute. And as kids get older and say that they have a boyfriend or girlfriend we smile with a twinkle in our eye and sometimes shake our head.
Have you ever thought that in speaking this into our children and allowing our children to speak such, that we are training our kids for disaster? I searched for Song of Solomon 2:7 and another verse came up as well. It is in the same book, different chapter:
I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
that you not stir up or awaken love
until it pleases. Song of Solomon 8:4
In chapter 8 of the Song of Solomon the title is "Longing for her beloved." In the first few verses she says that she wished her beloved was like a brother because it is so hard to wait for him.
I myself know that the waiting can be hard! I am 28 years old and I have never been on a date. I have never held a guy's hand, never been kissed and never have had a boyfriend. When I was 13 years old the girls in my youth group did a Lady in Waiting Bible study. In that study I learned that God has a husband for me and that he won't complete me; however, we will complement each other. I learned that I need to do my part to get ready for marriage.
Ever since that Bible study that is what I have been doing. I never felt the need to date because God is detailed! I know that when God brings my husband across my path He will let me know! Why date and go through heartache(s) when I don't have to?
Let me share a few more verses with you:
20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam[a] there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made[b] into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said,
“This at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man.”[c]
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.
Genesis 2:20-25
12 And he said, “O Lord, God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show steadfast love to my master Abraham. 13 Behold, I am standing by the spring of water, and the daughters of the men of the city are coming out to draw water. 14 Let the young woman to whom I shall say, ‘Please let down your jar that I may drink,’ and who shall say, ‘Drink, and I will water your camels’—let her be the one whom you have appointed for your servant Isaac. By this[b] I shall know that you have shown steadfast love to my master.”
15 Before he had finished speaking, behold, Rebekah, who was born to Bethuel the son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, came out with her water jar on her shoulder. 16 The young woman was very attractive in appearance, a maiden[c] whom no man had known. She went down to the spring and filled her jar and came up. 17 Then the servant ran to meet her and said, “Please give me a little water to drink from your jar.” 18 She said, “Drink, my lord.” And she quickly let down her jar upon her hand and gave him a drink. 19 When she had finished giving him a drink, she said, “I will draw water for your camels also, until they have finished drinking.” 20 So she quickly emptied her jar into the trough and ran again to the well to draw water, and she drew for all his camels. Genesis 24:12-20
63 And Isaac went out to meditate in the field toward evening. And he lifted up his eyes and saw, and behold, there were camels coming. 64 And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she dismounted from the camel 65 and said to the servant, “Who is that man, walking in the field to meet us?” The servant said, “It is my master.” So she took her veil and covered herself. 66 And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done. 67 Then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. Genesis 24:63-66
These are just two examples from the Bible of God bringing couples together. Did you see how detailed their testimonies are! They also didn't have to guess or wonder; the Lord guided their steps.
There are also the testimonies of Ruth, Esther and Hosea, and you can read them in their books that are their named after them in the Bible.
You might be confused that I mentioned Hosea, for his marriage was different. God told him to marry a prostitute. He did so, she had 3 children, but she went back again to prostitution. That might not make sense to you; however, God was using Hosea's marriage as a example of what God's people Israel were doing.
Hosea went through a lot in his marriage, but that wasn't the end of his story! The end of the example of Hosea and his wife is very beautiful!
And the Lord said to me, “Go again, love a woman who is loved by another man and is an adulteress, even as the Lord loves the children of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love cakes of raisins.” 2 So I bought her for fifteen shekels of silver and a homer and a lethech[a] of barley. 3 And I said to her, “You must dwell as mine for many days. You shall not play the whore, or belong to another man; so will I also be to you.” Hosea 3:1-3
She is redeemed and his wife again!
Instead of encouraging our kids to have boyfriends and girlfriends why don't we encourage them in their greatest relationship of all; their relationship with God. Isn't it a beautiful thing to have our children focus on God, to seek the plan and purpose God has called them to and to be trained in their spiritual gifts and natural talents? Isn’t it a beautiful thing to have our children focus on doing their best in following after God, and when the time is right, God will bring them their spouse! Everyone's story is different and you/your kids might not have to wait until their late 20's for God to bring you/them a spouse. Let us trust the One who has our plan and future in His hand with yoking us up with His best for us.
Do what He has called you to and prepare yourself for your promised relationship. It will not be in vain. No, I am certain it is worth the wait. Let us not awaken love before it's time.
Be blessed, beloveds!
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